Last night I balled my eyes out. My ‘tear-soaked pillow’ dream had finally come true. I didn’t even realize the sneaky bastards well up and before I knew it, warm, salty liquid was flowing out of my optics in torrents. Yes I tasted it. Just to be sure.
I was so perplexed by it, I felt a story start to form in my head. As such I couldn’t eat my feelings as it was close to one am and I didn’t have any snack in handy, so I quickly grabbed my laptop. Usually, something like this happens at around three am and am usually too lazy, too scared and too ‘don’t give a damn’ to eat or type up my feelings. But someone had said that once it comes, you gotta get it down. So here I am. 0056hrs Sunday morning.
Phantom’s Microsoft word usually takes a while to load in all the extra add-ins to it so as I wait, and wait, and wait for it to do that spinny thing, I close my eyes and try to remember what it was that made me cry and lose sleep. I do remember and this pisses me off. So I open a page and the blank sheet stares at me so nonchalantly, as if daring me to make a move. Of course am gonna do something that’s why I opened it. It’s amazing how good I am typing in the dark, really didn’t think I had it in me. Sorry, I digress sometimes. Most of the time.
Actually, all the time.
Anyway, so am there in the dark with this ghastly, bland and so bright view outside my window and all my negative energy riles up in some form of charade inside me. A text alert resonates across my room sending chills where no chills should be and I decide to pay back in kind so I select the chiller font, size twenty. Bold.
Then the staring game begins. Usually this is the time when nothing creative is popping in my head like popcorn and all I can see, in my head, is a swirl of words, letters, images that don’t make sense but evidently out there to haunt me. While writing this, my block took like twenty seconds but it felt like an eternity trapped in space.
By now you are probably thinking to yourself, ‘when is she going to tell us why she was crying?’ Well, too bad son that isn’t going to happen tonight.
Ps; Phantom is the only lad in my bed tonight. Thanks to Toshiba.
How unfortunate would it be to die with an untold story within you!